3. In music, staccato means that you play each note separately so each note is clearly defined – a bit sharp.
And you can create that similar staccato effect in your writing too, putting stress on nearly every word:
“She watched him come, her head bent into the newspaper so it wouldn’t look like she was staring, and as he approached his features clarified and she realised she knew him. He was the boy from last night. At the meeting, Sebastion”.
It feels like you’re reading her thoughts, right? Broken sentences are less suitable for formal writing, but they work well for a conversational tone:
“Faye listened in wonder. That boy was saying such things. To her. Nobody had ever spoken to her this way. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and cry.”
You can’t use techniques like this too often in your writing. Use it a lot and learners will feel you are deviating too much from what they ‘re used to. They will think you are trying too hard. The technique becomes too obvious.
So, use some moderation to break up a more flowing rhythm. Stress. Each. Word. But only when it really matters.
4. Present a Series
This is also a fairly easy way for using sentence fragments, but you must find fewer opportunities to do it.
Again from The Nix:
“He was young, nervous as all hell, and a brief career that as yet lacked distinction – he had, so far, mostly busted screwed-up hippie kids for minor infractions. Loitering. Jaywalking. Curfew.”
An editor may suggest you turn the above into one sentence: … for minor infractions such as loitering, jaywalking, and breaking curfew. But that changes the rhythm a lot, making it less dynamic, and the different offences almost blur into one.
5. Quicken the pace
Broken sentences can help you quicken the experience of a narrative. For instance:
“Faye went home and locked herself in her room. Seriously considered, for the first time, having a boyfriend. Sat on her bed. Didn’t sleep much. Cried a little. Decided by the next morning that, strangely, she cared for Henry a great deal. Had convinced herself that she’d always liked his looks.”
You must admit this broken version has more attention getting effect than if it had been written as a long sentence.
6. A thought comes to the surface
We don’t always talk in full sentences (we seldom do) or think in full sentences. So why do we need to write in full sentences?
Good writing is about paying attention
You will see a lot of broken sentences on LinkedIn.
But most people use them willy-nilly – just to shorten their sentences without paying attention to flow.
The result is a stilted form of something that looks like poetry but isn’t poetry, and it’s actually hard to read.
You have permission to use broken sentences.
But
Please, do pay attention.
Read your writing aloud and listen to the rhythm. Does it sound natural?
Would you read it to one of your learners?
Good writing for learning is about concern and paying attention
Paying attention is showing respect for your learner.
A way to show you care.
That you care about their needs. That you care about connecting.
Writing for eLearning is an act of compassion. Showing you care.
Yes, even if you write for compliance. Human content will always win.